Read an interesting comment today on the University of Pennsyvania FTD website. It talked about FTD being missed sometimes because it is frequently something that causes sufferers to land in the legal system rather than the health care system. I can understand that. Making inappropriate sexual comments to a worker at the dementia care center is bad. Making the same comments to a member of one's family is worse. Much worse.

I hate what this disease is doing to Glen, but understand there is nothing I can do and at least on some level I have accepted and understand that. I also hate what it doing to my family, and I'm not dealing with that quite as well. Kevin is so very angry... and rightfully so. He's angry that his father's been taken away from him. He's angry that his mother's an emotional basket case. He's angry that his girlfriend has been traumatized. And I keep thinking there's something more I need to be doing to make it easier, to keep him from wanting to spend as little time here as possible, to somehow not make his last memories of his dad .. well.. awful. I know I am losing Glen. Sometimes I fear I will lose Kevin too. It makes me very sad.

Someone said to my sister that we have been dealing with an "absurd level of awful." Sometimes it's awfuller than others. The past couple of days have been those kinds of days. Thankfully there are people like Karen, who came and cooked me lunch and watched the hockey game with me providing a little island of actual FUN. People like John, who came and took Glen for a long walk after the game, which helps keep him calmer.

Next time you feel yourself getting angry with or about to get into an argument with someone you love.. stop for a minute, take a breath and ask yourself just how bad it really is. And then.. give them a hug instead.